Mmmbop!
Because losing is such a rare experience for the University of Oklahoma football team, any loss is difficult for fans. Last night's loss was a little easier for me, though, as we lost to Brigham Young University, my second favorite team. I like BYU because only attractive, moral and well dressed students are admitted, and that is how it should be. A BYU player is named "Manase." Someone must have run out of names when he was born.
I have scores of friends and loved ones who are big fans of BYU. Every single one of them was gracious to me last night. Not one made a snide comment, or reveled in the misfortune and injury of OU's Heisman winning quarterback, Fantastic Sam Bradford, whose acne has disappeared. Not one.
Contrast that with Texas fans, many of whom would celebrate if Sam sustained a spinal injury and ended up paralyzed from the wiener down. I received from UT fans a host of text messages, emails, Facebook messages and Facebook posts that were tacky, classless and, for the most part, neither funny nor clever. I'll receive more because of this post. My favorite was from my boy Leslie, who said, "the first game played in the new Cowboy Stadium, and OU lost." Cold blooded.
Many Sooner fans have regional loyalties. I do. Several years ago I was proud as could be of Texas when they won the national championship. Why can't we all just get along?
Because Texas is racist and hurtful, and people shoot folks from towers and whatnot.
God Bless Glenn Beck for hammering home the message about the utter awfulness of Green Czar, Van Jones. President Obama appointed him to indoctrinate us with communist theory, and force us to go green. You know the old saying, "once you go green, you never go back."
With Obama, it is all about color. Jones resigned under pressure because it became known he is a nutter and a hater.
During last year's campaign I ranted and raved about Obama, and the danger that he'd appoint a host of radicals and white people to positions of great power and influence. He has done that and more. We have a wise non-dieting Latina woman as our new Supreme Court Justice. She will take affirmative action to a whole new level of idiocy.
White slavery, retroactive abortions and the Alaskan Death Camps for dissenters are coming.
Van Jones. Green Czar. That guy should have been Red Czar, as he is a commie. I love the youtube clips of him referring to Obama's opponents as "a**holes." I don't think Jesus would want him to say things like that about Republicans. Nice. Very ghetto. Spray paint that some place, won't you? Bust some caps while you're at it, beeyotch.
Jones helped found a San Francisco (naturally) group called "STORM." That bunch didn't stress the need to help victims of storms, either. STORM means Standing Together to Organize a Revolutionary Movement." That doesn't sound like Boy Scouts, Mormons, or the Lions' Club putting on a bake sale to buy new band uniforms.
STORM. Storm. The Storm. Der Sturmer. That was the name of the Nazi Party newspaper in Germany, from 1923-1945. Coincidence? Conspiracy? Resurrection of the Third Reich by our first muslim president? I report. You decide.
Oh, and Jones CHAMPIONS the cause of that dreadful, smelly dreadlock havin' cop killer, Mumia Abu-Jamal, who sits on death row in Pennsylvania. May allah have mercy on him. May allah have mercy on his mother for giving him such a goofy name. No offense. Read up on that case when you're in the mood to get really angry.
How bright is our wonder boy president if he appoints radicals like this? Yet his administration is full of them.
Oh well, that's what the Republicans get for nominating that moron McCain.
Glenn Beck and other swell guys took down this rapper Van Jones. Good for them.
Obama's evil minions have many terrible plans and goals. Two are particularly terrifying. They want to restore the so-called "fairness doctrine," which would force media outlets to broadcast opposing viewpoints. People won't listen to hippie liberal communist radio programs because they suck. For real. It has been tried and the efforts have all failed. People don't like things that suck. The solution, naturally is for the government to step in and make us listen to liberal drivel. That'll suck too, but THE GREAT BARACK knows best and sees all.
(even if his wife looks abominable in her "daisy duke" cut-offs, and girlfriend, please do wear a bra).
We will have to endure opposing viewpoints after Rush Limbaugh and others have finished, or they will be shut down. Stations will be taxed and fined by the FCC. Christians will be beheaded in public squares.
The other scary "danger" is the proposal that the President of the United States be granted the power to shut down the internet in an emergency. Yes. I'm not lying, even if this does sound like something I'd make up. That's how the Nazis really achieved power in Germany in the 1930's. Hitler didn't start off as an absolute dictator. He was smart enough to avail himself of and exploit any emergency for his own purposes. This is why THE GREAT BARACK is often compared to Hitler.
Plus, I know Obama is back to smoking, and I hope someone catches him. Michelle will clobber him with a frying pan.
Cigarettes, not crack. Don't be racist.
I play the "Farmville" application on Facebook. It is lame and goofy, and it is an amazing time-waster. One can plant just about any crop he wants. Crops grow, they are harvested, and the player gets "coins," which aren't worth anything. The other day, I seeded my entire plantation with cotton. I thought it'd be kind of cool to see the cotton "grow." My best friend Jordan saw the farm page. He called me a racist and asked me if I could buy slaves to pick the cotton.
So I checked. Players can purchase everything from raspberries to radishes. Signs to silos. Picket fences to paving stones. Tents to Tara. All kinds of farmy stuff.
But no, one can't purchase slaves unless there are also watermelons growing. Now THAT would be funny.
At least ten people will fire me as a Facebook friend for that comment. I generally lose one each time I post a column from my girl Ann Coulter or my boy Pat Buchanan. But I digress. Back to Farmville.
Another friend arranged her plots so they spelled out OSU in pumpkins. It is incredible.
I'm going to do a big swastika with my crops.
There went another ten friends from Facebook.
Get well, Fantastic Sam. Thanks BYU fans and friends for making our loss a little more endurable. Have the best season ever. I also hope OSU has a great season, but I hope even more that OU beats OSU like a red headed stepchild in K-Mart.
Don't hate.
Happy Burfday to G.R.E. Thanks for letting me sniff and hang in yo pound, dawg.
(c) 2009 Randall P. Hodge, Esq., and Morningwood Enterprises, Ltd.
