A couple of people liked my piece called "Curatives." Thank you. I liked it too, and I think some of my best blogs are the "nice" pieces. I am sort of sorry the same evil monkeys who inhabit the closet of Chris Griffin on "Family Guy," also live inside my head. They make me write hurtful things about muslims, Michael Jackson and President Obama.
Some have asked me if I followed up on my "promise" to get in touch with the nice lady I haven't heard from in over a year.
First, I thought she was in an assisted living place. I was afraid that maybe due to declining health, she couldn't live on her own any more. I also thought she was 87. Turns out she still lives in her little apartment, and she is only 82. So much for the magic and accuracy of Google.
Sidebar: People are going to stop using Google if they don't knock it off with all the phony "hits" when one searches. Notice the first five or so matches are paid sites that are cleverly designed to look like the precise answer to your search? It is getting worse. Nothing is really free. I have started skipping down to the 5th or 6th result, so I can get out of the fake sites.
After I found she was living at the same place after all, I sent a letter to her. She called me the next day, and we had a great chat. Turns out the reason she stopped sending me cards was rather simple. She said, "well, no offense, but I heard you got fat, and I don't like fat people."
That was hurtful.
I'm not so sure "fat" is the kindest, most constructive or most accurate word to use. There are others, such as zaftig, rubenesque, rotund, full figured, more to love, etc. They all mean fat, though, and they are usually used to describe fat women.
I'm lying again, of course. Not about being fat, which I am, but I am lying about that being the reason I lost touch with my friend.
While I was in the Aryan State of North Dakota, which I love and miss every day, she called my home. One of the lodgers at that time helpfully advised her that I'd moved and wouldn't be coming back. Nice. Thanks for that. Sometimes the Lodgers liked to stir up things. So, thinking I'd moved, my friend stopped sending me the cards and gifts.
Now that we have exchanged numbers, it will be easier to stay in touch, and I intend to do just that. I will also go over and see her if ever the temperature drops below 100°.
I was in Walgreens the other day, and I found the cheesiest, sappiest card I could find. It was lilac in color and overboard in its verse, but so were the sweet cards she sent me over the years. Perfect. So I bought it, and as if that weren't enough to get me kicked out of the males, I found a Lilac colored Sharpie, and I used that to write a short note.
I felt a lot better after we talked. I am going to make it a habit of calling her, even though I dislike to speak on the phone.
I'll tell you something about people I'm always intending to call or write or get in touch with. They'll die on me if I don't hurry.
There are so many people who have been placed along my path over the years. They've helped, taught, bailed me out, pointed me toward a solution, and encouraged me, more than I deserve. I might write a few more tributes to these incredible people.
Bonne Nuit.
(c) 2009 Randall P. Hodge, Esq., and Morningwood Enterprises, Ltd.
Some have asked me if I followed up on my "promise" to get in touch with the nice lady I haven't heard from in over a year.
First, I thought she was in an assisted living place. I was afraid that maybe due to declining health, she couldn't live on her own any more. I also thought she was 87. Turns out she still lives in her little apartment, and she is only 82. So much for the magic and accuracy of Google.
Sidebar: People are going to stop using Google if they don't knock it off with all the phony "hits" when one searches. Notice the first five or so matches are paid sites that are cleverly designed to look like the precise answer to your search? It is getting worse. Nothing is really free. I have started skipping down to the 5th or 6th result, so I can get out of the fake sites.
After I found she was living at the same place after all, I sent a letter to her. She called me the next day, and we had a great chat. Turns out the reason she stopped sending me cards was rather simple. She said, "well, no offense, but I heard you got fat, and I don't like fat people."
That was hurtful.
I'm not so sure "fat" is the kindest, most constructive or most accurate word to use. There are others, such as zaftig, rubenesque, rotund, full figured, more to love, etc. They all mean fat, though, and they are usually used to describe fat women.
I'm lying again, of course. Not about being fat, which I am, but I am lying about that being the reason I lost touch with my friend.
While I was in the Aryan State of North Dakota, which I love and miss every day, she called my home. One of the lodgers at that time helpfully advised her that I'd moved and wouldn't be coming back. Nice. Thanks for that. Sometimes the Lodgers liked to stir up things. So, thinking I'd moved, my friend stopped sending me the cards and gifts.
Now that we have exchanged numbers, it will be easier to stay in touch, and I intend to do just that. I will also go over and see her if ever the temperature drops below 100°.
I was in Walgreens the other day, and I found the cheesiest, sappiest card I could find. It was lilac in color and overboard in its verse, but so were the sweet cards she sent me over the years. Perfect. So I bought it, and as if that weren't enough to get me kicked out of the males, I found a Lilac colored Sharpie, and I used that to write a short note.
I felt a lot better after we talked. I am going to make it a habit of calling her, even though I dislike to speak on the phone.
I'll tell you something about people I'm always intending to call or write or get in touch with. They'll die on me if I don't hurry.
There are so many people who have been placed along my path over the years. They've helped, taught, bailed me out, pointed me toward a solution, and encouraged me, more than I deserve. I might write a few more tributes to these incredible people.
Bonne Nuit.
(c) 2009 Randall P. Hodge, Esq., and Morningwood Enterprises, Ltd.
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