Tuesday, May 06, 2008
 | Sell Phones My Nokia cell phone, which Billy Rodgers, gave me, has been despondent and suicidal over my move up to North Dakota. It jumped out of my pocket into a glass of water, right after Fox News called North Carolina for that awful date-rapin' Mao Tse Tung-lovin' Obama -- three seconds after the polls closed. So it's tore up. Not sure what's up. No one up here has anything to do with ATT, and all the clerks stood there and laughed at David Kelly and me when we asked for help. I ordered another from ATT, and maybe I'll have it by the weekend. I'm excited about getting it, as it has a fax machine, a printer, and a microwave oven. I will be able to text and text and text now. The new phone will allow me to compose, type and send as many as 20 text messages at the same time. Best of all, the phone is about the size of half a credit card, but isn't nearly as thick.  You can reach me through MySpace for high school girls, or through my Gmail account. I am adjusting to life in a different state. I have not learned how to tell the difference between the men and women who live here. Everything is brown – taupe, actually. This area is almost a desert. The air is dry and dusty, and I'm already catching some stupid respiratory funk. Dry air is no doubt the culprit. Or Canadians. We are perilously close to the Canadian border, and it's no tellin' what they're cooking over there. David Kelly has it as well, but he is allergic to water, air and sunshine, so who can say. I was not kidding in an earlier post when I suggested North Dakotans put gravy all over everything, including fresh fruit. The other day someone with us ordered biscuits with sausage gravy, a lite choice to be sure, but the chef at Perkin's decided to slap some cheese on top of the gravy. So much for diets. We saw "Ironman" the other day, and it only cost $4.00 at the matinee. I felt like we were in Hooterville, as that is cheap. Food is not cheap, but the movie was. "Ironman" was a good movie, and it is amazing to watch a (presumably) sober Robert Downey, Jr. I presume he is sober because he usually gets into trouble when he uses, and he can't make movies. Some people get caught every time. If you see this film, there is another scene at the end of the credits. It takes awhile to sit through, but I suppose it is worth it. I am still learning my new job. It isn't difficult, but I'm old and give out. It takes me about 20 times longer than normal people to grasp a new concept. I also don't like to work in the first place. But it is interesting, and the other guys are nice about helping me. As is my custom, I stand around and look stupid, and people rescue me. It's a design for living that really works. All the best from Lawrence Welk and me, RPH, Esq., N.V. ©2008 Randall P. Hodge, Esq., and Morningwood Enterprises, LLC |
contemplative 
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