Kosovo, McCain, BuhROCK & Hillary

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Kosovo, McCain, BuhROCK, & Hillary Current mood: pessimistic Category: News and Politics Boy did I write a thought provoking bit the other night on Kosovo. Never mind that my idea that Germany invade Poland, Russia, Belgium, Luxembourg, Denmark and France would have started World War I again. My plan was for us to stay out of the damned thing and watch it all on television. I worked on it for over an hour. I don't know what button on the keyboard I hit, but the next thing I knew it was erased, never to return. Since I threw in a few digs about the muslims and all the chaos they have wrought, perhaps it is better; hired muslim assassins have already tried to scimitar me to death over 78 times, and I'm getting tired of it. I also revealed the truth about BaROCK Obama's "wife," who is actually a not half bad drag queen, if you've seen her perform. Seriously. I have the photos. All of that commentary, like President Lincoln, "belongs to the ages" because I hit the wrong damn button. Tonight brings the delicious TMZ-worthy gossip that fat, bald and old John McCain has had him a baby doll now for some time now. She is 40, and he is 97. So much for straight talk. So much for integrity. So much for an American hero. I rather like McCain's wife, Cindy. She is a lovely, charming lady, and she has had her share of struggles. She became addicted to pills a few years ago, and as far as I know, she kicked the habit. I don't know how she stays off of them, but I hope she has and does. Anyone who has eaten pills is all good in my book. Pills are …well, they are just swell when eaten in moderation, which they never are, by the way. Mrs. McCain should have super glued his weiner when she found out he'd been sleepin' on the cheatin' side of town. So how does the old, fat, bald, liberal, tax-cut hating, illegal mexican invader loving Senator from Arizona live with himself? Making time with a Washington lobbyist, half his age, who represents powerful interests with business before McCain's committees. Give me a break. What a positively novel way to remove undue influence from government. We're supposed to believe this big phony John McCain is going to fix a "broken Washington" (I do hate that slogan, Mitt)? This nut McCain pushed so-called campaign finance reform through the congress, and took away many of our fundamental rights of free speech, and the right to petition our government to stop being stupid. There's a lot there not to like about John McCain. I've only scratched the surface. He is a phony. In the unlikely event he is elected, he'll be a combination of Presidents Ford and Carter. President John McCain will be incompetent, and he will suck. He is a lousy politician, in that he is too quick to dive into bed with democrats. McCain is as bad as the dumb President Bush is about heeding advice. He doesn't. He won't listen to reason, and he is loath to change his mind. Think President Bush (again, the dumb one) after the Baker Commission released its recommendations for getting us out of this war without end in Mesopotamia. Bush ignored virtually every single recommendation. Why? Because he is the great decision maker. He is also the most un-smart man ever to occupy the Oval Office. Thank goodness it is almost over, albeit he has practically wrecked the most powerful and formally most prosperous nation on earth. McCain loves the war. Unless we're going to make Iraq the 51st state, I suggest we declare defeat and leave. Would it be so bad to admit this awful place into the union? Heck no. They have oil, we need it, and we should take it. Formally. I can't stand McCain. Ain't votin' for him. I also hope "the American people in their righteous might" will not elect this African muslim whose grandmother in KENYA has a pet chicken on her lap. Particularly one who comes with a ball and chain named Michelle. Mrs. Obama is likely the meanest woman in the world. You think Hilary was a piece of work? Wait 'til this one lands her broom. Dave Chappelle said something that fits here, but he was talking about Rosie O'Donnell: "she wears underwear with dick holes." Michelle Obama wears Hanes briefs, and she has a weiner. I have the pictures to prove it. Seriously. She ugly too. I hope at this point that Senator Clinton wins. We already know she is evil. Imus believes she is Satan. We know she hates men. We know she shot Vince Foster. We know she is fat. We know her voice is grating. She effed up health care somethin' awful. I know the beast fired the lady who was my secretary when I was on White House Staff from 1983-88. But she is smart, and she learns from her mistakes. Sometimes I am sort of pulling for her. Sometimes I believe part of what I think she was trying to say when she wanted to make a point about something she was avoiding. I also consider she was reared by good conservative stock. Deep down, she must retain some traditional values. She went off to that lesbian college, and they…well…they changed her. Still, perhaps she is the man to kick the muslims in the nuts next time they pull some of their trademark crap, here or somewhere in the world where innocents are trying to live and get by. It won't be BuhROCK. He is the "Manchurian Candidate," and would that he were Manchurian instead of a muslim. Our choices, folks, suck. Seriously. Love, RPH, Esq. N.V.